Rate you Wife. 1930's Style.
Posted: Thu May 15, 2008 8:21 am
I saw an article in the Metro today that was very funny (and extremely sexists but meh). A 1930's psychology professor created a compatibility test that basically rated your Wife from Very Poor to Very Superior. The idea was you gave your Wife a point for each of the following (unless stated otherwise).
1. A good hostess, even to unexpected guests
2. Has meals on time
3. Can carry on an interesting conversation
4. Can play a musical instrument
5. Dresses for Breakfast
6. Neat housekeeper, tidy and clean
7. Personally puts the children to bed
8. Never goes to bed angry, always makes up first (5pts)
9. Asks husband's opinions regarding important decisions and purchases
10. Good Sense of humour, jolly and gay (i don't think they mean in the modern sense - but you never know)
11. Reacts with pleasure and delight to marital congress (10pts) - [this is my favourite for two reasons, a) its placed at number 11 where I am sure, given the points rating it was at the top of his personal list and b) marital congress. . . . ie does she want to have sex with you.
)
12. Lets husband sleep late on Sunday and holidays
But wait, there are some to detract from their score before we get the totals. For this one subtract one point (unless stated otherwise)
1. Slow in coming to bed, delays until husband is almost asleep
2. Doesn't like children
3. Fails to sew on buttons or darn socks regularly
4. Wears soiled or ragged dresses and aprons whilst around the house
5. Wears red nail polish (shock horror)
6. Often late for appointments (5pts)
7. Seam in hose are often crooked
8. Goes to bed with curlers in her hair or too much face cream
9. Puts her cold feet on husband at night to warm them
10. Is a back seat driver
11. Flirts with other men at parties or in restaurants (5pts)
12. Is suspicious and jealous (5pts)
Add them all together and if the total is
0-5 very poor, 6-10 poor, 11-15 average, 16-20 superior, 20-25 very superior.
PS I don't dare rate Lizzie so lets just say she is very superior. . . .
1. A good hostess, even to unexpected guests
2. Has meals on time
3. Can carry on an interesting conversation
4. Can play a musical instrument
5. Dresses for Breakfast
6. Neat housekeeper, tidy and clean
7. Personally puts the children to bed
8. Never goes to bed angry, always makes up first (5pts)
9. Asks husband's opinions regarding important decisions and purchases
10. Good Sense of humour, jolly and gay (i don't think they mean in the modern sense - but you never know)
11. Reacts with pleasure and delight to marital congress (10pts) - [this is my favourite for two reasons, a) its placed at number 11 where I am sure, given the points rating it was at the top of his personal list and b) marital congress. . . . ie does she want to have sex with you.
)12. Lets husband sleep late on Sunday and holidays
But wait, there are some to detract from their score before we get the totals. For this one subtract one point (unless stated otherwise)
1. Slow in coming to bed, delays until husband is almost asleep
2. Doesn't like children
3. Fails to sew on buttons or darn socks regularly
4. Wears soiled or ragged dresses and aprons whilst around the house
5. Wears red nail polish (shock horror)
6. Often late for appointments (5pts)
7. Seam in hose are often crooked
8. Goes to bed with curlers in her hair or too much face cream
9. Puts her cold feet on husband at night to warm them
10. Is a back seat driver
11. Flirts with other men at parties or in restaurants (5pts)
12. Is suspicious and jealous (5pts)
Add them all together and if the total is
0-5 very poor, 6-10 poor, 11-15 average, 16-20 superior, 20-25 very superior.
PS I don't dare rate Lizzie so lets just say she is very superior. . . .
