Things To Do Before You Die

Fez · Post by **Fez** » Thu Apr 20, 2006 3:30 pm

plagerism is an ugly word. i prefer 'stealing'

Kirstypie · Post by **Kirstypie** » Thu Apr 20, 2006 8:16 pm

Is that the one with the Interactive Shed Game? And how they get the lion sounds on nature programmes?

Fez · Post by **Fez** » Sun Apr 30, 2006 9:51 pm

41. go to work pissed so you can say to that fucking know-it-all bitch you have to work with exactly what you think of her fucking constant ass-kissing to that deluded fuck-wit know-nothing shit peddlar of a boss you have to spend all fucking week working your fucking balls off for and never catch a fucking break from. you'll get yours in hell you fucking slave-driving bitch.

Andy · Post by **Andy** » Sun Apr 30, 2006 10:08 pm

Fez wrote:41. go to work pissed so you can say to that fucking know-it-all bitch you have to work with exactly what you think of her fucking constant ass-kissing to that deluded fuck-wit know-nothing shit peddlar of a boss you have to spend all fucking week working your fucking balls off for and never catch a fucking break from. you'll get yours in hell you fucking slave-driving bitch.

42. Pick Fez up on Thursday and drive him to pool then have a whip round from his friends on the promise that he will videotape himself doing all of this. Give him the whipround and make him drink cider until he can't stand and has passed out thus stopping him from being sick in the back of my Corsa.
43. Join him (in getting drunk), Woody can drive.

Fez · Post by **Fez** » Sun Apr 30, 2006 10:14 pm

bring it on bitch!

Andy · Post by **Andy** » Sun Apr 30, 2006 10:18 pm

Fez wrote:bring it on bitch!

Oh, it's been brought!

44. Make many contingency plans that ensure that you are never Fez's ''bitch''. (That's somebody else's role).

Fez · Post by **Fez** » Sun Apr 30, 2006 10:22 pm

45. make lot's of promises you can't keep

Andy · Post by **Andy** » Sun Apr 30, 2006 10:35 pm

Fez wrote:45. make lot's of promises you can't keep

Look Fez, if you want a ''bitch'' and you want one quick, mail order one from Thailand. It's a bit like your Punto, it's quick, easy to drive, good body work, comes with a full service history, relatively cheap and reliable.

If you want a night out on a school night, forget it, I've tried that with you once before........ never, ever again......... I can still feel my hangover and I will never ever forget the image of seeing 31 kids' face spinning in front of me as I tried to explain subordinate clauses whilst wanting to hurl really badly.

Fez · Post by **Fez** » Sun Apr 30, 2006 10:37 pm

that was a good night out. but why did we ever celebrate the end of term the day before it happened?

Andy · Post by **Andy** » Sun Apr 30, 2006 10:48 pm

I know that I was given my Teacher's certificate for passing my NQT year that day from Norbert. Therefore, for two year's worth I thought I would go for a quiet pint celebrating with Rowenna, she invited you out, we got chatting, we got drinking, we got drunk, we got drinking, we played a lot of darts, we carried on drinking, the next thing I know is it's 2.00am and he turfed us out and I had two double whisky's, a pot noodle and a pepperami as a nightcap. I don't remember much apart from waking up in my chair at 6.45am completely hammered and giggling inanely in the stock cupboard. That was, without doubt, my all-time worst hangover - it lasted until Sunday lunchtime. The amount of respect I still get from my Year 8 group for that is quite staggering and very scary.

*Hears two songs in his head ''Those were the days my friend, I thought they'd never end'' and ''It feels like I've been drunk ten thousand times before, and these could be the best days of my life''

Fez · Post by **Fez** » Wed May 03, 2006 5:53 pm

43. go to a bnp meeting and tell them all how fabulous they are and how much cuter they'd look in matching dungeries and flip-flops. [maybe best to get steaming drunk first before trying that one]

Post by **Mike** » Thu May 04, 2006 7:46 am

44. Go to work in Arthur Dent attire and look surprised when people comment on your dressing gown and towel. :D

Fez · Post by **Fez** » Thu May 04, 2006 4:56 pm

45. get a job with the samaritans and go to work pretending to be marvin!

Andy · Post by **Andy** » Sat May 06, 2006 12:19 am

Fez wrote:45. get a job with the samaritans and go to work pretending to be marvin!

46. get a job with the samaritans and when it goes silent at the other end say in a yorkshire accent ''Luxury! You think you've got problems? You've got it easy sunshine! In my day, you had to be up at 4 and went to bed at 3! Luxury!''

I know I nicked this from Monty Python but hey, it's class!

Post by **Mike** » Sat May 06, 2006 8:36 am

47. Train to be a parachute instructor for those doubles jumps. After jumping from the plance go - OH NO! I have FORGOTEN the parachute! And watch the passenger go to brown alert. :D