the grit & argy-bargy

[Fez]

in december of the seventh year of the present millennium, two disperate fugitives from the local correctional house for unwanted science experiments, henceforth referred to as hairy and the gimp, met at a secret location in the wilds of manchester and preceeded to miss the bus into town and had to wave down the later service thus arriving late to the underground meeting organised by the local punk community. undeterred and aided by the consumtion of certain liquids known to have a high alcoholic content, the nefarious pair preceeded to enjoy what was left of the opening act's set and the subsequent entertainment provided by the following band before the appearance of the night's ruling punk authority known as goldblade. later during the same memorable evening while waiting at the bus stop, and commenting to each other on the fact that the guitarist from that awful band we saw on woody's birthday at that stockport pub was standing across the road, two important decisions were made. while the gimp decided to post a suitably glowing review of the gig written with his usual artistic flair at a known criminal accomplishes' website, hairy formulated plans to begin his own relgion which would preach the importance of getting drunk at bbq's and beard worship. since this time, both of these internationally wanted deviants have gone to ground, but recently this review believed to have been written by the gimp has emerged. in it he reflects on the recorded work of the two supporting bands from that december night in his distinctively offbeat and subverting style. citizens are reminded that if either of the suspects named in this report are seen, contact the police or a local animal sanctuary immediately - do not approach unless you have access to a large quantity of tequila to distract the fugitives with until the relevant authorities arrive at the scene.

the grit / 'shall we dine' - as my accomplice pointed out during the review of this band, available at cost from the 'live in manchester' thread dated 07/12/07, the group are indeed from the far reaches of newcastle, a fact which is all the more obvious considering one of the songs on this album is called 'a geordies song' [note the shocking lack of an apostrophe from the title]. grammatical inaccuracies aside, this record is an entertaining collection of rockabilly songs that break the general punk rule by having an average play length of more than four minutes, although this isn't noticeable when the stirring choruses are being repeated with heartfelt vigour. being the only studio recorded work the band has produced in its six year existence means the music has been honed to opptimum perfection and should appeal to any listener with a liking for a good honest sing-a-long, most especially the modestly titled 'i came out the womb an angry cunt''. tackling such important north-east england subjects as drinking, women and upsetting the neighbours, the songs are immediately familiar and may induce spontainious foot tapping or hip shaking [seek immediate medical advice if this happens to you]. a rollicking good party album that would appeal to the general masses beyond the usual punk suspects, the only note of criticism would be for the bass player who tries to disguise his workman-like rhythyms by using the impressive looking stand up bass, however in the screech of electric guitars only a truly anal killjoy would notice such things...


argy-bargy / songs from the streets - presenting an immediately intimidating visage of four middle-aged men who are no strangers to the allure of pies and beer, argy-bargy encapsulate what a good punk band who never quite had the opportunity to tour their brand of street-wise, in yer face music will become. producing only two records in a lengthy career has meant while those in the know will always head out to whatever local venue these guys are holding to ransom, the vast majority will remain in the dark about what a solid act is being missed. songs from the streets is an apt title for this collection of smart anthems that hide behind a sort of mock working-class dumbness; on the surface the lyrics could be dismissed as just about a drinking culture divorced from politics, but actually the songs are incitful and littered with intelligent observations about modern society; 'saturdays glory' and 'stereotypes' being cutting examples of this. probably not as universally appealing as the grit, this is still a fantastic album for anyone with an interest in what the underground punk movement sounds like.

[Mike]

Nice bit of prose there Mr. Fez! Very entertaining!